“Sticks and Stones May Break My Bones, But Words Will Never Hurt Me!”
is a lie.
There, I said it.
Many of us were told this phrase when we were young to combat the mean things that kids can say to one another. But it is simply not true.
Words can hurt. Sometimes more than we realize.
That is a pretty bold statement, so let me explain a bit further.
“Our subconscious minds have no sense of humor, play no jokes, and cannot tell the difference between reality and an imagined thought or image. What we continually think about eventually will manifest in our lives.“
~ Robert Collier ~
The subconscious is mental activity (programming) just below your level of consciousness and it controls a minimum of 80% (and some studies say up to 95%) of what you think feel and do!
Your subconscious programming affects your health, weight, family life, finances, choices, etc.
You see, everything you desire lies outside the realm of what you already know. Meaning, if you want to make more money or lose weight or become more visible, you'll have to start doing some new things to achieve it.
Your Words Impact Your Success
We also have patterns that we reinforce every day without even knowing it. A number of years ago I had the opportunity to meet Dr. Shad Helmstetter, one of the fathers of motivational psychology, and learn about “self-talk.”
He tells us that, “from the moment you were born, every single message you got, everything that was said to you, everything you heard, everything you saw, everything you did, everything you thought about, every message you got was ‘typed' into your personal computer keyboard – also known as our 5 senses. And then, those messages that were typed into your computer keyboard were recorded on your hard drive your brain.”
He tells us it is very much like a computer, every message that you got while you were growing up was recorded and stored permanently in the brain.
This is important to know because that part of the brain recorded all of those messages you got but that part of the brain doesn’t know the difference between something that is true or false, right or wrong, or positive or negative. It’s job is simply to record all of those messages that we got from other people and then we began to repeat those exact same kinds of messages to our self and that is called “self-talk.”
“Self Talk” ties to the Law of Repetition — every time you get a message and it is recorded again, it gets stronger and you get the message again and it gets stronger still.
Dr. Helmstetter explains that those minor pathways in our brain are being created by us getting those different messages from the people around us. When those messages get repeated by someone else and then we repeat them to ourselves with our own self-talk, those pathways become roadways and then the roadways become highways and some of those highways become interstate highways.
And those are the major programs that govern our lives. So whatever programs you have right now that’s who you are that is who you’ve become. It’s not that you were born that way. You were born with unlimited potential, but we become the programs that we get most.
Now, this is pretty advanced stuff, but I know you can handle it and of course, I'll be here with you all along the way to make you feel safe and keep you moving forward. Because I want you to be that person that busts through your blocks, feels your value like never before, and creates a much bigger impact on the world.
Example of Self-Talk in Action
Here is an example. I had a private client that used to say “I am so fat! I just need to lose weight.” She really wanted to grow her speaking career but was procrastinating on a number of things that were leading her to success in getting booked.
So, we addressed her words, her self-talk. You see, this beautiful woman wasn't really fat! She maybe had that 5-10 pounds a lot of us would like to lose, but nothing more. But what she SAW in herself was not attractive. That mindset and the words she said to herself kept her from standing in her real power.
Over time, she changed her words and her perspective of her appearance. Today, she holds herself in a positively powerful light and her audiences are jumping to hear more from her!
I'm not smart enough.
I need more training.
So and so knows more than I do.
I am fat!
No one would see me as an expert.
No one would pay me that much!
I feel like a fraud.
are all examples of self-talk that doesn't help your business and is likely not true at all!
How Do You Put This Knowledge Into Action
The first step is to become aware of your words.
What are the things you say about yourself?
What are the words that you think about yourself?
If they are not powerful and life-affirming, they could be dragging you and your business down.
I know it sounds simple and that is because it really is simple. It just takes focus to see where you can alter what you are saying.
What words will you be letting go of today?
Until we talk again,
Live Fully — Love Openly — Laugh Often — Leverage Your Brilliance — Connect Authentically — Get Your Message Out — Serve with Impact — Prosper Everyday
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